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Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Is it true? Could it be true?
Although nothing I'm about to write is actually "true" or "proven" or necessarily supported or even addressed in the family social science/marriage research, what I'm about to say FEELS true ... and conventional wisdom has it to be somewhat true ... and I'd like to think we (Carol, and my darling husband) have accomplished a FEAT and thus if this were true we can brag we're victorious over another of marriage's large hurdles:
92% of all couples who remodel an entire kitchen WHILE LIVING IN IT will end up divorced.
No, that's not true. Or maybe it is? No one has ever documented the connection between marital longevity and kitchen remodels. But, based on very unscientific conversations of all the stress, choices, disagreements, missed bids-for-connection, $ spent, appliance-caused arguments, more choices, knobs, counter-top-conflicts ... the list is long ... it seems that that statistic must be fact. A dissertation topic, perhaps?
Here's what I do know: WE MADE IT! Our kitchen is (basically) done and we are happy as ever despite our on-going argument about the positioning, installation, and reality of my vintage library ladder on the south end near and over the windows, the ladder that needs some creative engineering and has caused many a contemptuous eye-rolling by both parties in this kitchen remodel. (Damn it: the library ladder is going to be SO COOL! So let's get 'er figured out already, honey. Ok? ... said with a happy couple smile and soft tone of voice, of course).
Here is it: one of our marriage hurdles ... overcome!
(I'll post more when the very-cool-way-creative-super-neat-library-ladder-to-get-to-the-cookbooks is finally installed). Check back!
92% of all couples who remodel an entire kitchen WHILE LIVING IN IT will end up divorced.
No, that's not true. Or maybe it is? No one has ever documented the connection between marital longevity and kitchen remodels. But, based on very unscientific conversations of all the stress, choices, disagreements, missed bids-for-connection, $ spent, appliance-caused arguments, more choices, knobs, counter-top-conflicts ... the list is long ... it seems that that statistic must be fact. A dissertation topic, perhaps?
Here's what I do know: WE MADE IT! Our kitchen is (basically) done and we are happy as ever despite our on-going argument about the positioning, installation, and reality of my vintage library ladder on the south end near and over the windows, the ladder that needs some creative engineering and has caused many a contemptuous eye-rolling by both parties in this kitchen remodel. (Damn it: the library ladder is going to be SO COOL! So let's get 'er figured out already, honey. Ok? ... said with a happy couple smile and soft tone of voice, of course).
Here is it: one of our marriage hurdles ... overcome!
(I'll post more when the very-cool-way-creative-super-neat-library-ladder-to-get-to-the-cookbooks is finally installed). Check back!
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Happy Couples Get Great Deals
It's true. And who doesn't love (pun intentional) a great deal?
We promise the What Happy Couples Do Blog won't turn into a sales pitch. Forever. But, we're so excited about the upcoming HAPPY COUPLE holiday (insert fanciful thoughts of your loving Valentine here), we just launched a promotion to share the love on our Happy Couple Company site. Check it out!
Between now and Happy Couple Day (er, most people call it Valentine's Day), $10 off orders of $30 or more.
That's a deal worth loving, eh?
We promise the What Happy Couples Do Blog won't turn into a sales pitch. Forever. But, we're so excited about the upcoming HAPPY COUPLE holiday (insert fanciful thoughts of your loving Valentine here), we just launched a promotion to share the love on our Happy Couple Company site. Check it out!
Between now and Happy Couple Day (er, most people call it Valentine's Day), $10 off orders of $30 or more.
That's a deal worth loving, eh?
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Happy Couples Crank It Out
Big, fun week for Happy Couple Company! Woohoo!
1. It's almost Valentine's day, you know. So we said to ourselves: "Is there a better time to get Happy Couple Company giftware up and out the door?" Our answer: "Duh." Let's roll. We began blanketing the twin cities with some Happy Couple products, seeking some early feedback from our favorite gift stores. And, within minutes, guess what? Our first order came in from Bibelot, the hottest gift store in St. Paul. Woo hoo! We packaged them up and happily hand-delivered them down Grand Ave. Woo hoo again. Be sure to checkout Bibelot Shops if you're in town (or the handy link to the right). If you know cool gifts, you know Bibelot.
Stay tuned for more giftstore news! We'll be adding a "Find us at" list to the Happy Couple site soon. The list is expanding quickly. 2. As we approach a big launch of HCC, we continue to work on our Happy Couple company website (thanks to Tony Bruess, our 14 year old Vice President of Technology). One of our goals is capturing all of the Happy Couples behind the scenes of HCC. Here is one of them: the adorable Vice President Brianna and her happy partner Joe. Could they be any sweeter? Brianna works tirelessly as our only "employee" at the moment. B, we hope to offer benefits and an office to you soon. Woo hoo!
3. Because we, duh, all know communication is the key to happy couples, we created - just this week - the Happy Couples Communicate kit. Yes, you need this. I (Carol speaking here) need this. I should "note the good" more often, post a little love note, apologize and make things right (and get to my point ... which is often "I love you, dear, even when you drive me nuts!") Isn't this the cutest little communication kit you've ever seen? Comes in blue, and red. I like blue the best. Oh, wait, I love the red. I'll take one of both. And 1,000 more for every couple I know.
If you want to come by and assemble a few kits, swing on over. We could use all the fingers we can get.
4. Emily Balsley is our best-kept secret weapon, cranking out the brilliant designs for HCC from her studio in Madison, Wisconsin. Seriously, you send sweet Emily a question or design idea and she sends you the hippest, coolest responses in all of 60 seconds flat (including pdfs, proofs, plus a pocket full of Emily B. goodness). Emily B, three cheers to you (and your cute happy husband Stephen)!
More on Emily coming soon at www.happycouplecompany.com5. Whew. There is no number 5. But check back soon. Lots going on at the Happy Couple Company Headquarters!
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Saturday, January 8, 2011
Happy Couple Haircuts
I've often said the secret to a great business should have something do with either food or haircuts - the two things people need, over and over. And again and again.
Today as I'm sitting in the hair chair of Johnny K ("my" hair guy), here's what I (Carol here) witnessed:
Two year old named Nissa (I know because I was aggressively eavesdropping) sitting on a booster getting her curly blonde locks clipped. Her dad strolls happily around the salon with Nissa's baby sister Gretchen (again, good over-listening pays off). "Mom" keeps Nissa occupied by holding up books, squirting 'good-smellin' stuff in the air and introduces an occasional funny-face contest in the mirror. Squirm. Wiggle. Nissa is done. Now it's mom's turn. Dad's turn - as more auditory spying reveals - was completed before I arrived. Dad now sits happily in adjacent seat, rocking sweet Gretchen back and forth. She coos. "Mom" and Nissa chat. Dad returns from next-door coffee shop with milk, cookies and something hot and frothy for "mom."
I finally can't take it any more: "Hi!" I say to little Nissa. She is shy but engages me with her big lashes. I promptly get to my real goal, a comment to the happy couple: "I can't imagine my husband ever coming to the salon with me on a Saturday afternoon, and actually appearing as if he's enjoying it!"
"Mom" and dad smile. She briefs me on their story. I knew there must be a story! What happy couple spends two hours juggling kids, water, electricity, scissors, babies, toddlers and conversation with multiple adults on a Saturday afternoon ... and concludes the outing with a smile?
A couple with a ritual, that's who.
Pre-kids and newly married, this happy couple began many a "date night" at this same salon: cuts, styles, then "out on the town" looking fabulous. Now - while Nissa sweeps and blow dries most of the salon and baby Gretchen begins a hungry howl - this young couple forges on with their date, making it a family outing. "It's just what we do."
Ah ... ritual. It doesn't have to make sense to anyone else.
Cheers to you, the happy couple with the new haircuts .. whoever you are!?
Monday, December 13, 2010
19 years + blowing snow
Today was our 19th wedding anniversary!
What does one do to celebrate 19 years of bliss ( er, um, er, I mean 19 years of hard work, and some grumpy evenings, and many sweet love notes, and wonderful laughter, and arguments about how fast you drive or how much sleep children need)?
You get a snowblower, that's what.
While I sort of - not really - looked high and low for the recommended 19-year-wedding-anniversary-gift ("Bronze" was suggested), we decided we should get a snowblower. Actually, it wasn't even really an anniversary gift, but today happened to be the day to secure one. And how perfect the day, as more than 19 inches of snow blanketed our city over the past 3 days.
As I thought about it, a snowblower is an apt metaphor for what happy couples do.
It's powerful (just like our relationship history). It makes things easier (like learning how to fight fair or repair when things get 'stormy'). You don't think about it most of the time (read: April - October), but when you need it, there's no substitute (reminds me of "commitment" ... the deep structure of all happily married souls).
I'll spare you my other more trite associations, but you get the point: snowstorms in MN are inevitable. Being prepared is priceless.
Happy anniversary to me ... and you (honey).
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Super Sad
We were married almost 19 years ago (December 13th, 1991. Holy cow, that's a long time ago).
A few weeks ago our sweet friend and priest ... the beloved man who married us ... died peacefully and unexpectedly in his home. We are super sad.
But we also feel lucky to laugh heartily every December 13th when we pay homage to our couplehood by watching our hour and 47 minute wedding ceremony (yes, ceremony. The reception adds another few hours to the video). That night, Fr. Tom Campion told stories of goodness, happiness and previewed the hard work we would encounter in marriage. Dang, he was right! He was a smart ... brilliant ... man. Fr. Tom gave us a foundation of key wisdoms that eve, as he has many times since. About life. About sacrifice. About marriage. We still practice what he taught us. He really knew - some how - what happy couples must do.
In memory of Monsignor Thomas Campion, we say "Amen!" to him. And we are ever-thankful because, as he was oft-heard saying, he'd "rather marry 'em than bury 'em."
You've touched us and made us happier. Thanks, Fr. Tom. We will see you again some day.
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Grateful For
It is a national holiday today (my favorite of the year, actually): A day of being thankful.
So, here's my short list of things (Carol writing here) I am most grateful for:
1. Claire and Matt (the neighbor kids who are out shoveling the snow off our sidewalk right now). Why? Because their parents have raised them to feel awesome about helping others. I love Portland Ave.
2. The way my husband calls me "his bride" when talking with .. well .. everyone. I heard my dad refer to my mom the same way last night. It's contagious.
3. Cream. (For the first time in 42 years, I started drinking coffee. Yes, I know. Welcome to adulthood.) All I can say is frothed milk is best. Cream is a close second place when other milk-altering techniques are not available.
4. My kids, who don't like to wear what I tell them, do what I tell them nor have the manners I tell them they must. But, my life is richest with them keeping me real.
5. And hand sanitizer. Because everyone, especially my groom, knows what I'm LEAST thankful for: puking. Amen for that little bottle of liquid germ killer which keeps the barfing at bay. At least some of the time.
What are you thankful for? Gratefulness, like happiness, is contagious, so be sure to tell someone.
So, here's my short list of things (Carol writing here) I am most grateful for:
1. Claire and Matt (the neighbor kids who are out shoveling the snow off our sidewalk right now). Why? Because their parents have raised them to feel awesome about helping others. I love Portland Ave.
2. The way my husband calls me "his bride" when talking with .. well .. everyone. I heard my dad refer to my mom the same way last night. It's contagious.
3. Cream. (For the first time in 42 years, I started drinking coffee. Yes, I know. Welcome to adulthood.) All I can say is frothed milk is best. Cream is a close second place when other milk-altering techniques are not available.
4. My kids, who don't like to wear what I tell them, do what I tell them nor have the manners I tell them they must. But, my life is richest with them keeping me real.
5. And hand sanitizer. Because everyone, especially my groom, knows what I'm LEAST thankful for: puking. Amen for that little bottle of liquid germ killer which keeps the barfing at bay. At least some of the time.
What are you thankful for? Gratefulness, like happiness, is contagious, so be sure to tell someone.
Monday, November 22, 2010
Happy Couple Challenge
Dearest Readers, we have some exciting new ventures we'd like to tell you about.
First, you know about our product line, right? In case you hadn't heard, in addition to our three books, we now have a set of giftware/housewares designed to remind couples to connect as frequently as possible. Research by John Gottman shows that couples who maintain a 5:1 ratio of positive to negative moments are happiest. Happy Couple products motivate couples to live the ratio. Who likes being happy? I do, I do! Check out our online store and read about our mission.
Second, we have an exciting challenge going on here, at a new blog, The Happy Couple Challenge (click here to check it out). Here, real (cool) happy couples will be documenting 30 days of using Happy Couple Company items to bid for connection. Two women (so far) have agreed to participate. Both are amusing, smart, fun, witty, and overall awesome. Kristen was one of my (Anna here) first friends in graduate school! She talked me off the ledge after a full-blown panic attack in the TA office one day. She rocks. She also blogs here: http://showeringwithsharks.blogspot.com/. Alisha went to high school with me and we've remained close friends even though we've lived in different states for the past 10 years. She and Cameron are one of my favorite couples; they know what it takes to connect under all kinds of circumstances, including living in different countries. She also blogs here: http://lishyskitchen.wordpress.com/
Kristen has already started posting and Alisha will be starting soon. I can't wait to see the creative ways these volunteer bloggers integrate our products into their already fun and positive relationships. Follow along. Join in the fun!
First, you know about our product line, right? In case you hadn't heard, in addition to our three books, we now have a set of giftware/housewares designed to remind couples to connect as frequently as possible. Research by John Gottman shows that couples who maintain a 5:1 ratio of positive to negative moments are happiest. Happy Couple products motivate couples to live the ratio. Who likes being happy? I do, I do! Check out our online store and read about our mission.
Second, we have an exciting challenge going on here, at a new blog, The Happy Couple Challenge (click here to check it out). Here, real (cool) happy couples will be documenting 30 days of using Happy Couple Company items to bid for connection. Two women (so far) have agreed to participate. Both are amusing, smart, fun, witty, and overall awesome. Kristen was one of my (Anna here) first friends in graduate school! She talked me off the ledge after a full-blown panic attack in the TA office one day. She rocks. She also blogs here: http://showeringwithsharks.blogspot.com/. Alisha went to high school with me and we've remained close friends even though we've lived in different states for the past 10 years. She and Cameron are one of my favorite couples; they know what it takes to connect under all kinds of circumstances, including living in different countries. She also blogs here: http://lishyskitchen.wordpress.com/
Kristen has already started posting and Alisha will be starting soon. I can't wait to see the creative ways these volunteer bloggers integrate our products into their already fun and positive relationships. Follow along. Join in the fun!
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Happy Parents...
This happy parent (Anna) realized something this morning.
My hubby and I have mastered the art of descending the stairs of our glorious, new-to-us, old dream home in just the right way so they don't creak! Here are the rules:
1. Walk sideways.
2. Step on your tiptoes.
3. Step as far from the edge of the step as possible.
4. Skip the third step from the top. It's not worth the risk.
5. Try synchronizing your steps with the artificial ocean waves sound we have playing.
How ridiculous are we?!
I know, I know. They tell you to be as loud as you can be with babies so they learn how to sleep through anything. We tried. It worked for several months. And then it didn't work anymore. Somehow he turned into the type of baby who wakes up when Daddy's ankle cracks when putting him in the crib. How? No idea. How to change it? We've tried everything.
Don't get me wrong. I absolutely love mommyhood. So much it hurts. But today I feel tired. So tired, in fact, that I cried when there was no apple cider in the fridge. My little "Happy Couples Are Fulfilled" glass - just waiting to be filled - was mocking me! My hubby and I then started laughing.
Get some sleep, you say? I wish that solved it. I'm not tired because I didn't get enough sleep (9 glorious hours), but because I just want a lazy day. One of those days that you keep pressing play on the DVD player because you're so enthralled with the new tv series you rented on netflix. One of those days that Carol has never experienced because she's never lazy!
All this to say, I am so thankful for my happy marriage. Because happy marriages make for happy parents! We certainly are fulfilled, as my little glass reminded me this morning (hey, we were able to laugh about it. That counts, right?). With or without apple cider. Fine, it's even better with apple cider.
Happy Sunday.
My hubby and I have mastered the art of descending the stairs of our glorious, new-to-us, old dream home in just the right way so they don't creak! Here are the rules:
1. Walk sideways.
2. Step on your tiptoes.
3. Step as far from the edge of the step as possible.
4. Skip the third step from the top. It's not worth the risk.
5. Try synchronizing your steps with the artificial ocean waves sound we have playing.
How ridiculous are we?!
I know, I know. They tell you to be as loud as you can be with babies so they learn how to sleep through anything. We tried. It worked for several months. And then it didn't work anymore. Somehow he turned into the type of baby who wakes up when Daddy's ankle cracks when putting him in the crib. How? No idea. How to change it? We've tried everything.
Don't get me wrong. I absolutely love mommyhood. So much it hurts. But today I feel tired. So tired, in fact, that I cried when there was no apple cider in the fridge. My little "Happy Couples Are Fulfilled" glass - just waiting to be filled - was mocking me! My hubby and I then started laughing.
Get some sleep, you say? I wish that solved it. I'm not tired because I didn't get enough sleep (9 glorious hours), but because I just want a lazy day. One of those days that you keep pressing play on the DVD player because you're so enthralled with the new tv series you rented on netflix. One of those days that Carol has never experienced because she's never lazy!
All this to say, I am so thankful for my happy marriage. Because happy marriages make for happy parents! We certainly are fulfilled, as my little glass reminded me this morning (hey, we were able to laugh about it. That counts, right?). With or without apple cider. Fine, it's even better with apple cider.
Happy Sunday.
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